We men know that women love to gossip. Because of that, everything in your private life is guaranteed to end up doing the rounds in the gossip-mill: your body shape, penis size, sexual performance, off-hand remarks, stuff said quietly in confidence, sleepy mumblings, your dirtiest fantasies, family problems, etc etc. It's all juicy grist for the herd. Which is why you should never tell women anything.
Similarly, women can and will use this gossip-network to shaft you if/when they feel like it. Especially when a relationship doesn't work out or ends badly.
I've already written about how women tell lies to themselves, so that they can avoid all blame and function without going off the rails. This is how they have made themselves out to be the darling little angels that society sees them as, lying to themselves and to each other and to men. (That's a thought to explore: how the entire social-construct that is civilization is built upon the lies that women tell each other and men. Kinda sobering.)
The lies that women tell themselves go further. Many women will automatically look at everything that men say in the worst possible light. Quite often as a bullshit excuse to cause drama, perhaps for the purposes of hot make-up sex afterwards. Or simply to fuel her narcissistic need for being the center of (your) attention in a nasty and manipulative manner. (Another thought to explore: how women are obsessed with gaining men's attention. Do they really require male validation via sex that badly?)
Finally, women's lies to her self include the changing and manufacturing of memories.
Once things go sour then out comes the fine-tooth-comb. Everything that you ever said, did, intimated, mumbled - everything! - gets gone through by that comb. Looking for anything that can be used as ammunition against you. It's very much like women pulling out things you've said or done 10 years ago, inflating them beyond reason, and using them as ammunition for drama or frivorce or the like in the here-and-now.
All these little nuggets will get looked at critically, examined under a microscope, stress-tested, in an effort to find anything that can be looked at in a negative light to become ammunition for your downfall. What was once "cute", "loveable", "adorable" is now "creepy", "fucked up", "crazy". Then they're spread amongst her girls in an effort to make her look like the blameless and helpless victim, while you're a piece of shit nastiness that really deserves to be hunted down and killed.
If there's nothing really damaging - then she'll make some shit up. She'll even manufacture memories about these lies - convince herself that they're true - and finally, will spread them amongst her social circle to fuck you over.
I knew a crazy BPD/NPD cunt who did this to an extreme, over and over with her boyfriends.
"I got pregnant with his baby, then I miscarried, and it's all his fault!" Actually there's only your word for that. I can also see what you're doing: cutting away his social support network and friends. Yeah, sure, sugar. (She did this twice that I know of. Funny how I'm seeing a pattern here - which her female friends couldn't seem to see. Willful blindness!)
"He beat me up so I got a restraining order on him!" Which is why you still go around to his place - 'cause he can't come to yours. Yeah, sure, sugar. Oh, you just confessed that you lied about that to all your friends? And they're still your friends? What a wonderfully supportive bunch, there for you in your hour of need. A further thank-you is in store for fucking around the courts system for your shits and giggles - cunt.
I said a while back that there are times when men need to be teflon. Part of that is avoiding telling women anything. Part of that is avoiding explaining anything. And part of that is simply avoiding the worst types the moment that you run across them. Including minimizing contact with her friends. When they know what she's like, yet they still stick with her through thick and thin, then they're closet-crazies as well.
Keep your frenemies closer be damned, you are who you associate with.
Yes, you end up with less female friends. Is that really a bad thing, though? To purposely stay away from the drama-queens and nutjobs? To protect your life, your self, from the insane?
Be teflon, hide from the cohorts of crazies, avoid them like the plague of zombies that they are.
Secrets are the currency of female friendships. They trade them among one another. It's always wiser to have someone else's secrets to trade - it's a socially poor woman who is reduced to trading her own. Thus, a woman will mine her b/f for his.ReplyDelete
An interesting point. Would it be fair to say that women's secrets are likely very bland, banal, and same-same?Delete
Though thinking about it, the "secrets" about their b/f's that they're passing on also seem very bland, banal, and same-same. Childish and lacking in depth. Empty and frivolous.