What I'm talking about is counselling-style therapy.
You know. Marriage counselling. Depression counselling. Group therapy. Yadda fucking yadda. The fashionable shit which the herd loves to follow and drool over.
"Our couples therapist said <insert psychobabble here>."
In my opinion (get that, you fucking useless therapists? this is my opinion) this shit is generally an utter waste of time for men. Especially when much therapy (especially couples therapy) is automatically focused on validating the woman and invalidating the man. It's just a sick extension of the matriarchal focus our times, another club to bash men over the head with.
My reasoning: the wimminz lurv lurv lurv to talk their shit over. To all and sundry. They'll talk until Hell freezes over. Which is fuckin' amusing given that all women do is talk to each other and ask each other for advice on life and boys and their man. Which advice comes from their frenemies - good fuckin' luck there, babe. The rest of it is "you go grrrl" crapola these days. As is much therapy IMO.
Men don't bother talking that much, on the whole. We do. I'm more-than-half-convinced that most small-time mental/emotional problems that a man might have involve teh wimminz talking incessantly, earbashing the fuck out of him, until he switches off/goes crazy.
Which immediately gives us a solution to many men's problems. Give him a week in a place where he doesn't have to talk or listen - especially to women - let him fuck around and do whatever stuff he wants - and he'll immediately improve. He'll have the mental space to calm down, actually think, get a grip on stuff, and sort things out on his own.
Of course, there's a good chance that said "sorting things out" might include realizing internally that him hanging around his woman or women on the whole does not make him happy. He's happier by himself. End of relationship, thank you very much.
For men, sharing is not caring. Therapy is not the answer. Personal space and time by ourselves is our key to sanity.
(Note: There are some indications that Anna Freud's asexual adulthood might have been a result of her father's 4-year treatment of his own daughter. This inclines me towards considering psychotherapy and the like to be suspect.)
---ADDENDUM---
Commenter Anonymous brings up one valid reason for a man to go to a counselor: to help him rediscover himself (on my newer post Personal Time and Space is Golden for Men). The relevant part of his comment:
When I got divorced, I did go to a counselor, a very wise guy, and the first thing he asked me was "what do you like to do"?. I had no answer. He spent the next couple of months talking about what I'd like to do. I felt like one of those escaped animals that was totally bewildered.Thank you for that Anonymous.
Therapy is a waste for men and women period. It doesn't change anything, the women just whine and whine and feel justified in their whining and not doing anything. I knew a psychiatrist that left private practice because that was all it was and went back to treating the severely mentally ill because she was actually doing something positive.
ReplyDeleteThe whiner is getting *validated*. She's being *listened* to.
DeleteHAH!
No wonder that psychiatrist went back to dealing with the severely mentally ill. Even women can't handle a steady diet of constant earbashing and whining.