Wednesday 13 February 2013

Beginnings - Exposing the black poison in the soul

So, here's the obligatory "first post" introduction-thing. Humph.

What's this for: Whatever the hell I want it to be for. Generally, it's about the "regrowth" of myself in various ways.

Where the hell am I: New Zealand.

Who the hell am I: A guy living in the fucked-up and twisted western society that is New Zealand. While I have Maori (and Australian Aboriginal) blood in me, I look white. Haters can deal with it, I'm not a product of miscegenation - I'm a melting-pot child. I'm allowed to call a nigger a nigger, because I am a nigger, you politically-correct racist bastards.

What the hell am I doing here: Exposing some thoughts in the vain hope that my story and journey will help someone else not have to go through so much stupid shit with life. Or at least will give them a few pointers and cause an "ah-hah!" moment. Occasionally.

Specifically about: Women. Experiences, what I see, and thoughts on how not to get shafted™ in your life. At least, not too badly. I keep the more PC-life-doings shit for FaceCrap, which is where I keep in touch with overseas friends.

Yes, this is a man-thing. You girls can call me bitter and misogynistic if you wish. These days, most women-stuff sounds like the meowings of kittens in a sack with a brick. Ready for the local river.

Some days, things are blacker than others. On those days, the nihilistic poison exposed will be blacker than usual. Assuming that I bother to post - the preference will be for quality over quantity, so that there might be a post once every week or so. Depending on my work-load and mental state and if there is something I think worth the sharing.

A little more about me: I am an introvert (ISTJ, with leanings towards INTJ). My IQ is in the high 130's/low 140's - when I can be bothered to expose it. Most times I deliberately act dumber than I really am, in an effort to let others expose their thoughts - so that I can have extra viewpoints and grist for my thoughts. The visible outer shell has been that of a non-judgemental, amiable guy, not too fucking smart eh.

I am divorced. My brother is divorced. Our mother was an early "single mommy": her first child was my half-sister (to the local milkman LOL how stereotypical/cliche is that!) - adopted out. Then our mother married a criminal on the run from another country (Australia) and had us. Once she divorced him, she was goddamn lucky to manage marrying another man.

I am an early product of what might be called "thug breeding". No illusions about that. Literally the only reason that I am not in the Mongrel-Mob or Stormies/Storm Troopers (Americans can think of them as our local Hells Angels) is because of my mind: I dragged myself away from the streets in search of better. It is possible to do: my brother and I did it.

In my case some of the streets stayed, though not much and well-hidden. It's hard to tell about my kid brother. I think less than what stayed with me, given what happened to him was worse in many ways. He took way too much shit for the sake of his children, until eventually he was done with it. His ex-wife is lucky, if more streets had stayed with him she might be dead. Think the movie: "Once Were Warriors". I think it was very close.

This is my speakeasy, where the venom spews out. At this point the comments are left alone: if they start to flame with trolls I'll moderate them or turn them off. Arguing with a retard on the Internet drags you all the way down to their level.

It's also very undignified.

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