Sunday 2 June 2013

Marriage, Divorce, and Homosexuality

From The Atlantic, studies of gays and lesbian marriages, some knowledge of the interactions of men and women are teased out.

Some very interesting excerpts and explanations why, follow.
Beyond that, gay marriage can function as a controlled experiment, helping us see which aspects of marital difficulty are truly rooted in gender and which are not. A growing body of social science has begun to compare straight and same-sex couples in an attempt to get at the question of what is female, what is male. Some of the findings are surprising. For instance: we know that heterosexual wives are more likely than husbands to initiate divorce. Social scientists have struggled to explain the discrepancy, variously attributing it to the sexual revolution; to women’s financial independence; to men’s failure to keep modern wives happy. Intriguingly, in Norway and Sweden, where registered partnerships for same-sex couples have been in place for about two decades (full-fledged marriage was introduced several years ago), research has found that lesbians are twice as likely as gay men to split up. If women become dissatisfied even when married to other women, maybe the problem with marriage isn’t men. Maybe women are too particular. Maybe even women don’t know what women want. These are the kinds of things that we will be able to tease out.
Heterosexual wives are more likely to initiate divorce than heterosexual men. This is a very interesting admission - one that is discounted and minimised by women as a whole. It brings up a question that is uncomfortable for them to think about: that men might notice this trend. So it is minimised, covered up, concealed.

Here though, we have an interesting confirmation of this: "research has found that lesbians are twice as likely as gay men to split up". Because it involved lesbian - ie "abnormal" women - then "normal" women can dismiss this as an aberration.

We know better. This is a massive heads-up for men, one that only the completely stupid and naive will let go past without studying thoughtfully. When even women get sick of women - that implies volumes of what women are like as a whole. Yes, all women are like that.
Not all is broken within modern marriage, of course. On the contrary: the institution is far more flexible and forgiving than it used to be. In the wake of women’s large-scale entry into the workplace, men are less likely than they once were to be saddled with being a family’s sole breadwinner, and can carve out a life that includes the close companionship of their children.
Not all is broken? So, at least some things are broken? Perhaps the most important part of marriage: that it used to be a solid bonding between men and women: is now destroyed by no-fault divorce, and the rise of the frivorce. Women are never happy. Not even with each other.

What is most interesting is the call to the Peter-Pan syndrome that women loathe: "men are less likely than they once were to be saddled with being a family's sole breadwinner". A call to the minimalist lifestyle, where women can do mans work instead, while the man plays around and does...whatever he feels that fulfils him. Bringing up children or playing video games, as we choose.

Freedom is around the corner, you slaves to women.
Rather, marriage has become a “marker of prestige,” as the sociologist Andrew Cherlin puts it—a capstone of a successful life, rather than its cornerstone.
What should have been a foundation of life: marriage, children, mutual support, growing into your old age together with loved ones as a comfort: has been debased and sold off. Marriage and family are now simply a marker in life, not the purpose of life. Career and money and experiences are now the purpose in life, rather than something to build that life.
Among “middle American” women (those with a high-school degree or some college), an astonishing 58 percent of first-time mothers are unmarried.
In the same vein, children are no longer the focus. Having a child is seen as a wonderful thing, so much so that almost two-thirds of women will have one without a optional accessory that you tick off, like the education and career and trips overseas and wonderfully romantic marriage and lovely home...and the best possible man that you can manage.

Divorcing your current one so that you can go looking for a better.

Why does this happen? Is it because women are never happy? Not even with each other?

Our society has become sick. Women have sold their souls for a mess of pottage.

Soon, if not already, they will start to choke on it.

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