He's had a stroke of some type, which has impaired his mobility severely. He's pissed about it - really pissed - and taking out his frustrations on the family around him. Mostly swearing a lot, not actually physically abusive. "Mother-fuckng..." and etc. Quite hard on them.
Getting to be an older bastard myself, with my body starting to pack it in a touch, I can understand and sympathise with him.
It sucks when you can't do what you used to be able to do. When you were improving in life. Especially must suck when it happened so suddenly. Must be hella frustrating for a former Marine type.
Wish that I could say to him:
"Sir, you have been sorely wounded by life. I can understand. Yet you still have a mission to complete, and making it harder for others in that mission is counterproductive. Both for you and them."
That's about all I could say. Hell, it probably wouldn't help him and his, either.
Is there a point to this post? I'm not certain. Maybe something along the lines of: Try not to make the shit that happens to you worse by your actions.
What would I know though? I've not been through anything like that.
Take care all. - BPS
I had a stroke several months back. I observed afterward that all the polite "hold your tongue" interactions had become tiresome. I don't know if it was the stroke that brought this about or if it was just a pre-existing personality defect I finally let come through. The end result is I really don't give a shit about many things anymore.
ReplyDeleteSo I swear more, not at people. But I do find myself using course language in places I would not ordinarily have used it.
I guess the thing that most hit me was the isolation of having to go through it alone, because there is only me in here with me. I also had an overwhelming sense of being in a glass cube and looking out at the world as it went on around me.
Maybe your friend is feeling like that. It is very scary and stressful and as bad as it may be for those around him, I guarantee it's worse in his inner life.
I wouldn't know what to suggest, but ultimately he is going to have to work through it on his own.
So yeah, a man-up speech is probably not good right now.
Ain't nothin' wrong with being a bitter old man when waking life tends to be hell everyday. Telling the kids, "Get the fuck off my lawn!" whether they're on it or not I think is more of a stress/pain threshold coping mechanism. So were I in his shoes, probably wouldn't do anything different.
ReplyDeleteNot my friend, a father of a friends friend. Dunno, maybe I've been watching too many Popp videos or talking to too many military types while I was in the States.
ReplyDeleteA man-up speech wouldn't go across well, no. Especially from a freaking civilian from another country.
"Get off mah lawn an' stay off mah lawn!" While shaking the walking-stick at 'em. Hah.