Sunday, 27 July 2014

You're Shallow!

Her: You're shallow!

Me: Eh?

Her: What do you have against fat girls who drink and smoke? They could be perfectly lovely inside! It's the inside that counts, not the outside!

Me: My apologies. I was unaware that your dream man was a fat alcoholic drug addict who stinks of tobacco and tastes bad when kissing. I also didn't know that you like guys with mommy issues and who beat the tar out of their girlfriends and punch her teeth out and give her black eyes on a regular basis.

Her: ...

Me: Why are you wasting time talking to me? Go find the fat alcoholic drug addict of your dreams! In fact, I can point you to twenty-thirty of them, they're everywhere.

It's always good to slap them upside the head with their own delusions. Not that they learn from it. It's just fuckin' humorous.


  1. Hahahaha! Have you tried to imagine "the inside" of a fat girl who drinks and smokes? Ask any internal surgeon with some experience regarding thoracic and abdominal cavity. Some degree of hepatic cirrhosis, smoker's lungs, mesentery grown through with fatty tissue... not a pretty sight. Or you might Google for the images yourself. On an empty stomach, preferably.

    1. Please, I honestly don't want to. Fat, thin, the only difference is the degree of padding - cirrhosis, smokers lungs, ugh. I don't have the guts to google for the images.

  2. Hahah! Beautiful! Thanks for that link man.

  3. It's no secret that women hate short men. But that's not shallowness though. That's just uh.....evolution or some such, right? *sarcasm*

    1. Girls giggling: "He has short man syndrome!" At a guy who has no option to change his height.

      Girls crying: "Just because she's overweight!" About a girl who sure as shit has the option about losing weight.

      Too stupid to realize how shallow they are. #DoubleStandards