Alright, I've had this post sorta in the works mentally for a while. It's not quite gelled, and now I've run across something vastly better anyway. So here's the link to TheRawness, where he takes apart the mentality of The Game and Style and Mystery, etc. It's a lot to take in, very much worth the read:
And here's my original post/concept that I've been working on - raw and waaaay unfinished, what the hell:
It's amusing. I've often had the feeling while reading about pickup and Game that there was something wrong with the mindset behind it, or the way that it was actioned, etc. Yet I've not had the time and ability to put it into words. What's more amusing is that I've had a certain amount of success when applying PUA principles.
Well, over Christmas I had some time to think and came to these realisations:
• PUA still has vagina, pussy, as the prize to be sought
• MGTOW focuses on the behaviour of women and doing what you want
Now when you still have pussy as the prize, you are focusing on the woman still. You are putting her up on a pedestal still. Sure you might "cut her down" (more accurately, jump through hoops of her devising to get her attention) - yet in the end you are still entertaining her. If you are entertaining enough you might get your prize (you get to fuck her you dancing monkey you).
This does not address the root problem of spoiled and entitled women. It simply makes them more entitled and spoiled in the interim - at least until they hit The Wall. In addition you've dumped a big shit on your personal dignity and inner self-worth by effectively begging someone who is useless crap for the opportunity to have sex with them.
In addition the PUA are kidding themselves with the thought that they are "outcome-independent" - they sure as shit are not outcome-independent! Their entire mindset has one overarching goal: to fuck, means and ways be damned and never mind the duration of said sexual relationship. Anything and everything, even if married. The better-looking, the greater bragging-rights. Their whole existence is an ego-driven eternal validation of dick in pussy.
In the terminology of BoneCrkr this is the mindset of the Omega male: the criminal class who cannot hang on to a woman. Sure it's better than being a Zeta male - a weak-willed man - yet it would be better to become a strong-willed man than becoming criminal scum just for pussy. Shit, becoming strong-willed affects your whole life in good ways.
So if you need pussy that bad, take that $1,500+ you spent on learning to pick up women and the money you spend chasing women in bars. Simply buy a good-looking prostitute occasionally. Apply the old Banker's maxim: if it flies, floats, or fucks - rent it.
(Now that I've dropped a great steaming dump on the PUA mindset: fucking deal with it. Part of this post was inspired by reading about a couple guys who flew overseas for some sex-tourism - practicing Game on the locals and whinging about being expected to pay. Fucks sake, save your money and pay for a prostitute closer to home. It's not so fucking random. Or learn how to give a girl multiple orgasms and let the knowledge of that get around your social circle.)
Now when you focus on the behaviour of women you are putting up a filtering barrier that only lets women who match certain standards through. Sure you might have to adjust the filters occasionally, make them even more selective. It hurts when a narcissist manages to fool you and gets through to sink her claws into your heart. All part of the process though if you want to find the right kind of woman.
The barriers can be harder and higher if you can't be bothered with women at all. Cut them completely out of your life, speak minimally and professionally to them, etc. It's your life to do with as you wish: if in your mind it is better to make money, enjoy your life, and just fuck a call-girl occasionally - then more power to you. Good on you for deciding
This also doesn't address the larger root problem of spoiled and entitled women, it simply keeps that type out of your life. On the other hand it doesn't make the problem worse - which realistically is about the best that you can manage as an individual.
In aggregate is a different matter. Given several million men who aggressively filter out crappy women, eventually the useless crap turns to garbage that gets left to rot out in the cold. Sadly the rotting garbage has a distinctive smell (and sound) comprised of a lifetime of entitlement combined with the weak mentality of a victim:
"Where are all the men?"
"Where have all the good guys gone?"
"Man up!"
"You can't handle a strong, empowered woman!"
Ironically, the last accusation is almost correct: it fails when you realise that useless crap which has rotted down to garbage is trying to pass itself off as the absolute finest haute cuisine and liqueur. Nobody wants to put their bare hands into rotting, moldy, festering garbage which has a good sprinkling of rusty and broken razor blades mixed in with it.
It's not that we "can't handle strong, empowered women" - it's that we "refuse to bother with rotting garbage".
Literally, we refuse to tolerate your toxic waste mindset - which shows itself to all and sundry in your nasty and shitty behaviour. Which is why you put up barriers, hoops, fling out shit-tests, etc etc - your inherently broken entitled mindset puts these up so that you can have some shits and giggles from putting men through a dance. It's a sick form of control.
We refuse to jump through the hoops created by the mentally-defective woman in the slight hope that we maybe, possibly, kinda, sorta, might, eventually, one day have a shot at sticking our dicks in your pussy.
Doing that lacks dignity.
So the above means that PUAs serve as an excellent pre-filter for MGTOW: every woman who fucks a PUA is automatically going to be caught in the filters as someone to not bother with. Probably only worth fucking, assuming that you decide she isn't too high a risk for STDs - and will tolerate sloppy seconds.
This why I personally cheer on my PUA acquaintance, even though he's a maggot to all his male "friends" and would happily throw us under a bus for a shot at pussy. He does it quite regularly, a typical narcissistic sponge. Bros before hoes is pretty-much honored only in the breach, the only reason I tolerate him is to keep tabs on the shitty women out there.
It's also highly worth knowing many of the PUA tips, tricks, and tactics. Being able to understand parts of womanese is useful for your filters. Simple, classic things like:
"Hey, you" really means "Hey (I want to fuck) you" - and you can choose to take advantage of it
"Buy me a drink" - "No, but you can buy me one" - and save money by never buying women drinks again
"If you were XXXX you would YYYY!" - mentally change that to: "If you were XXXX you would eat dog shit!" - and remain unaffected by this shaming tactic
So, this leaves me with the realisation that PUA is merely another stage of coping. A lot of people will be quite happy with it as-is, yet it's not the end-all of life. Eventually, at some time, further growth involves the realisation that women really aren't all that and getting your dick wet isn't the end-all be-all of having a good life. That it actually is bros before hoes.
At that point the PUA might become an MGTOW and go to do what he wants. Women become largely irrelevant, an occasional pleasure while you do far more important things.
Which ignoring they as a group hate hate hate with a passion.
Great post. It takes time for men to understand that women, for the most part, will be the primary source of wasted time, frustration, lack of funding and pain in their lives. From personal experience, I can tell you that there's nothing special about women. They're not sugar and spice and everything nice. They cheat on their partners on a whim and frequently. They're pathologically narcissistic by default. Now that I understand these things, my life is a whole lot more peaceful.
ReplyDeleteMGHOW
Yep they're basically replaceable - this is why they don't like it, in their frantic efforts to be different they are far more alike than they can comprehend.
DeleteAnother amusing thing is when you stop actively chasing them, they still try to come into your life. Without trying, on your part. With your indifference you become even more attractive.
I'm shocked that there aren't any PUAs and Red Pukers attacking you (here in the comments) for writing this. Just like the very women that they try so hard to please and whose rules they obey just to play their "game", PUAs and Red Pukers are very sensitive to criticism and will retort with childish and personal insults. BTW, your analysis is 100% accurate.
DeleteIt's a beginner analysis, The Rawness had a much more detailed and far better one up (link in the article).
DeleteRegarding not getting much in the way of attacks, it's probably because this is an out-of-the-way blog. Nowhere even remotely mainstream Manosphere, many of the thoughts have probably been stated over and over already in many places with many variations.