Don't Aggravate A Sick Man

Men know instinctively not to do this. They find out you're sick, they ask if you need anything - yes or no, it's no problem. They then leave you to heal up on your own, maybe visit you in hospital to say: "Hi asshole!" We've got sense that way.

Women these days though: not so fucking bright.

Occasionally you will find a smart one, who goes "nurture" when they hear you're sick. Aka they like you and want you well. This is the woman to date if you can. Other women - well, they just aggravate the shit out of you.

Case in point: a woman earlier this year. We had literally only been going out for a week when I got a cold (computers, idiot users coming in to work sick, fixing a problem - you get the drift). Did she leave me alone? Did she offer to nurture me?

No. She went into full-on attack-mode.

Her: I'm wondering where I stand?

Me (completely fucked in the head): What? We've been going out for a week!

Her: I don't know where I stand, I want to know, I can't stand not knowing!

This is with me on the phone, coughing my goddamn lungs out with every couple of words (when it's bad I develop a cough).

When I got better, could think straight, etc - as I said to my mate: Where you stand is that you fucked up by being a completely selfish cunt while I was sick, trying to have that talk waaaay too soon. He wanted to know if I was gonna tell her to piss off, I told him that someone that needy and desperate and selfish didn't deserve it. Fuck her, I'm not giving her the chance for a dialogue: radio silence.

Protect yourself from these pieces of shit. In fact, it's worth "acting sick" just to see what a girl's reaction is. Use your brains, like I did when I had recovered and could think straight again.

It's a rough, poisonous world out there. Always be alert for the signs - some of these girls will do whatever they can to screw you over or wring something out of you.

For any girls reading this: don't be that girl.